Unit 6 - Universal Loving Kindness

Practice the Universal Loving Kindness (meditation) exercise.

 

This exercise was interesting to say the least.  I liked it, but struggled with it a bit.  I focused on my children and their suffering and then breathing health and happiness back into them.  My daughter was an easy choice because of her addition recovery and this is something that I have done for her for months through prayer.  My son is 18 and entering into the service after graduation, but he did his boot camp last summer between junior and senior year thus creating a bit of a power struggle between us.  He is still in high school but feels he is already a man for having left for three months last year.  The concept of this exercise is spot on, I am a form believer that you receive back what you give, so thinking of others is usually my first thought.  The problem is I always tend to put myself perpetually on the back burner as a single parent.  This exercise I think with practice could teach me how to not only think of others but of myself as well!

 

Complete the Integral Assessment discussed in chapter 11.

 

This assessment was a real eye-opener. The psychospiritual and interpersonal aspects of my life need some significant improvement. I am relatively emotionally stable, but I feel so much pressure as a single parent, full-time student and with a stressful work load to make ends meet it often seems overwhelming. I am the type to put all others before myself  and want to be supportive and nurturing to everyone but I feel like I am the one with very little support, again it gets overwhelming. 

 

Describe the exercise and assessment process. What did you discover about yourself? What area have you chosen to be a focus of growth and development? Why? What are some specific exercises or activities that you can implement to foster greater wellness in this area?

 

Through this exercise I realized I really need to focus on my own emotional life, and building a better interpersonal relationship with my family of siblings and father in hopes of building a better support network.  I feel like the biological lines of development have sustained me for some time.  But my psychospiritual line and interpersonal line both need some serious scrutiny.  I believe one aspect that I need to work on is my reactionary issues.  I do tend to react quickly in hopes of trying to control certain situations, usually involving my kids.  I also need to work on the level of development with my family and begin forgiving them for feelings of hurt.

Unit 5 ~ The Simple Mind Exercise

Compare and contrast the Loving Kindness exercise and the Subtle mind exercise. Explain your experience including the benefits, frustrations etc.

     I found the loving-kindness experience to be a much easier exercise than the subtle mind exercise.  I found that the loving kindness practice #1 exercise was more intriguing than the subtle mind practice #2 exercises. In the practice #1 exercise, we were asked to visualize a loved one who was suffering while we breathe in our in-breath. We were asked to allow the “dark cloud of suffering to ride the in-breath into our body” and then allowing them to completely dissolve in our heart (Dacher, 2006). The idea was to welcome all the loving-kindness into our heart thereby diminishing our self-centeredness and being able to share loving-kindness with others as we breathe out health, love and happiness. This exercise  however was quite beneficial as it did allow me to “rest in my natural state of peace and ease,” thus eliminating the stresses of life and leading me into the path of integral health and human flourishing (Dacher, 2006).  Relaxation at this juncture is hard to accomplish but I tried it first thing in the morning.  I did drift in and out of racing thoughts, but as Dacher indicated that with practice this will become easier and more effortless.  I do exercise regular medication and seem to do it better without the narrator talking and interrupting me.  My main focus was on the waves, I tried to put myself on a deserted beach with just the waves crashing.  It did seem to work well when I could accomplish the focusing away from the narration.

Discuss the connection of the spiritual wellness to mental and physical wellness. Explain how the connection is manifested in your personal life.

     A connection of spiritual wellness to mental and physical wellness is absolutely critical if an individual is to experience an interconnectedness.  It is also important for one to maintain a spiritual connection with a Higher Power.  This may not necessarily be God as we know Him but a Higher Power that allows for a spiritual connection.  Some people may not believe in Christianity or inn God at all but may seek another Higher Power.  One example of this I found very interesting, as I have stated before my daughter is in recovery from addiction.  She attends six meetings a week in which I attend a few with her,  in addition to my own Al-Anon group as well.  Many addicts are very "put out" with God and do not want the religious aspect being forced down their throat so to speak.  So in an effort to appease everyone the 12-Step Process focuses on a just a Higher Power without a "God" reference and Step #2  is "Came to believe that a Power higher than ourselves could restore us to sanity" (Al-Anon, 1992).  In doing this and keeping it generic, for a lack of a better word, it allows the individual to become spiritually connected and find a deeper sense of his or her self and their spiritual awareness which in turn helps them each cope mentally and physically with that person's life and their addiction without the threat of religion.  I attend church every week and for me personally I need that spiritual connection to get through my every day all week long.  My church is non-denominational and contemporary and I believe their focus on spiritual wellness is way beyond that of the traditional church.  I get a sense of peace, focus, joy, gratefulness and love every week just by walking through those doors!

References:

Al-Anon, W. O. (1992). The Courage To Change: One Day At A Time. Virginia Beach, VA: Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc.

Dacher, E. S. (2006). Integral Health: The Path to Human Flourishing. Laguna Beach, CA: Basic Health Publications, Inc. .

 

Unit 4 - Getting Started ~ Loving Kindness

 

Describe your experience. Did you find it beneficial? Difficult? Why or why not? Would you recommend this to others? Why or why not?

 

I absolutely loved this exercise.  This is something that we are currently studying in our church.  Focusing on others more than ourselves.  I think the overall concept is an excellent way of coming out of potential depression, isolation and loneliness.  These are things I struggle with as I am a single parent that works full time and goes to school full time.  I do not always have the time that others have to socialize, spend time with family and friends or even date at this point which has a tendency to make me sink into self-pity.  I know that in the end the "prize" of graduation in March and the commitment I made 3 years ago to finish this degree was completely worth every second. My degree will enable me to help others through a mind, body and spirit capacity with nutrition and fitness, something I am very passionate about.  I did not find this exercise difficult in the least, it is something I try to do on my own daily and this exercise just helped me define my process.  I would absolutely recommend this to others, I think "moving out of ourselves" and purposefully thinking, praying and releasing thoughts about others helps us to focus on something other than ourselves, our problems and helps to circumvent stress.  I especially loved the section where we think of someone that is suffering.  For the last 8 months, I have been dealing with my 22 year-old daughter Taylor and her addiction to drugs.  This is not how she was raised but unfortunately she chose a path to mask her pain that took her down a very dark road.  I know this may sound strange and do not think I would have said this 8 months ago, but I am thankful that she and I have been given the "gift" of this adversity.  It has helped us both realize what we did wrong, her with her choice of addiction and me with my choice of enabling.  I love her more than words and I am happy to say today that she has been "clean" for almost 9 months.  She has chosen life and is willing to do all that is necessary to create the life she now wants.   I believe her psychospiritual growth is only beginning!

 

What is the concept of "mental workout"? What does the research indicate are the proven benefits of a mental workout? How can you implement mental workouts to foster your psychological health?

A mental workout is just like working out the physical body. In a physical workout, the individual pushes the body to its limits and the body responds in turn with results.  The mind works exactly the same.  According to Dacher, "research studies and personal reports have also demonstrated that  mental training can transform the mind by reducing disturbing emotions that cause anger, hatred, fear, worry, confusion, and doubt while enhancing positive emotions such as patience, loving-kindness, openness, acceptance, and happiness" (Dacher, 2006).  I believe that I incorporate this mental work out daily when I actually do a physical workout.  I mediate during yoga and exercise allows me to get my mind straight through the generated endorphins.  I have always said that daily exercise for me is a cheap form of therapy and it is what has gotten me through many trials and adversities! Years of running has allowed for both mental and physical workouts.

Reference:

 

Dacher, E. S. (2006). Integral Health: The Path to Human Flourishing. Laguna Beach, CA: Basic Health Publications, Inc. .